1. Create a simple introductory theme.
2. Play it really really fast.
3. Make a lot of noise that has nothing to do with the theme but makes the piece sound demanding, including tremolos, arpeggios, etc.
4. About 1/4 of the way through, lead into a beautiful 20 second theme that makes the entire piece worth listening to.
5. Now’s a good place for a repeat!
6. Create an “out-of-place” chord for a modulation in the second ending of the repeat. Might as well play it really loudly too, just to make the audience go “what!?” (this is definitely Haydn’s influence on the composer).
7. Get really quiet as you introduce the new key (possibly repeating the introductory theme in the new key).
8. Make more noise.
9. Repeat beautiful theme again, usually twice.
10. End either by quietly fading out or striking a simple cadence as loud as possible.

There’s your first movement!

This is a joke, of course, but listen to enough of his sonatas and this is indeed the pattern Beethoven followed.